Saturday, March 10, 2007
Cookie dough and tears will get me through
So as I sit and write this I am indulging in cookie dough and I have finally gone 7 hours without crying. My crazy roommate from summer term just moved back in. You may remember hearing about her...the underwear theif...ring a bell? Yes she is back! I got an email a couple of days ago telling me that she was moving back in and she would like a spot in the kitchen for her stuff and would like us to clean her room and make the apartment all clean. Do you think I did any of that for her! HECK NO! Who do I look like? Not her personal maid! This morning when she moved in I locked myself in my room to study and didn't come out until she had left. Our paths didn't cross for a couple of hours then I started feeling Christlike so I went and said hi to her. It is so awkward. I quite frankly don't want to have to deal with this again. It is really frustrating because NO ONE knows just how bad all of the crap I put up with was. Hmmm....I wonder what I am going to learn from this? Maybe I'll set a world record for tubes of cookie dough inhaled in one day? Cookie dough...the one thing in my apartment that doesn't judge me for being so intolerant...thanks Nestle, I appreciate you being here for me during this hard time. Oh and Kleenex...thanks for being so ready for my nose when I need you...
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7 comments:
heidi...i am so sorry...you can do it...you are the perfect person for this situation because you really are SO christlike...plus I have your back and if she touches you or your stuff I WILL PERSONALLY make it so she wont ever be able to touch you or any of your stuff EVER again!! Cookie dough is good but maybe try some ice cream too...and thank you for not cleaning and making room for her stuff; that shows that you really do have a backbone!! Plus you are WAY too pretty to do that for such a jerky person!! Be strong, stand up for yourself, dont let her take advantage of your kindness and know that I LOVE YOU MOST and i will be down in a few weeks and i will be ready to put away "mrs. nice heather" and bring out "mean, no one messes with my sister heather" be strong and you can do it!!
HEIDI
You can do this!!! If she so much as even LOOKS at your underwear I'll come down and... and...um, and.... give her a SWIRLY!
Thanks Jan...I really appreciate it. I think a swirly is a very good idea! It will show her!
This calls for some seriously devious creativity.
Create a laminated warning sign you can leave on top of your clothing inside your drawers that says: Warning: This space monitored at all times by hidden camera. All theft and/or borrowing and returning without laundering will be prosecuted to the full extent of the law. And don't think I don't know who you are.
Create fake boogers out of rubber cement and wipe them on the outside of her milk jug.
Take note of her newest looking pair of shoes. Find the exact pair at the shoe store and buy a size smaller. Swap out one of her shoes with the smaller shoe when she is not looking.
There's always the chocolate ex-lax in brownies prank. (Warn all your other roommates not to touch the brownies, but then leave them out on the counter for the unsuspecting one.)
Or just imagine doing all these things to her and smile fondly at her whenever you're forced to pass in the hall.
THANK YOU so much for the ideas...the rubber cement boogers are my favorite! Between this and Janet's swirly she will learn her lesson not to mess with a Nilsen/Crowley! (I feel that I am part Crowley too...Grandfather says I'm his favorite non-granddaughter! Oh yeah, and spring Thanksgiving!) I love you all!!
Well if your paths so happen to cross and she says something put a smile on nod or shake your head, and move right on!!!!
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